I don't really like jokes in a way. I mean gags are fine but I like weird moments where what you have isn't really a joke, just tiny moments.

All my friends got dogs and cats for Christmas, and I got a starfish called Roy. I used to take him down to the park on a lead.

I've got it all in here ultra violets, flying saucers, strawberry bootlace come on get involved.

I'm a mischievous drunk.

You must have stuck a finger up your arse at least once.

They call me the confuser. Is he a man... is he a woman? Ooh, I'm not sure if I mind.

I always wanted to travel around and see lots of America, I'd never been to Boston, I'd never been to San Francisco even, so I'm quite excited to just go the places.