I'm thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
Norm MacDonaldI've seen people in theaters, and it just doesn't work, because you're talking to the guy next to you the whole time.
Norm MacDonaldI had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't; it was the real audience going crazy after everything that resembled a joke, that they could technically call a joke.
Norm MacDonald