Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.

I had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't; it was the real audience going crazy after everything that resembled a joke, that they could technically call a joke.

Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer.

I don't have to meet actors. I'm really blessed that I don't have to do all that horseshit.

Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex.

Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.

Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.