Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.

I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.

Were there no fools, there would be no flatterers.

I've been offered political shows before, and I don't know anything about politics and I feel uncomfortable making political opinions - there's consequences to them. I often think I'm wrong, so I really don't like getting in political or religious discussions because of the giant possibility that I might be wrong.

The character of giving advice often makes us accountable for the conduct of those we advise.

The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.

Louis [C.K.] is great. But I don't know how many you could do.