They're like ''You're an alcoholic.'' I go ''No, I'm not.'' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know?
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief.
This would have been a great game to watch if we didn't have any money on it.
Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer.
Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up.