Proper respect to others is the most prudent rule of directing the measure of reverence due to ourselves.

Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.

There is a very prevalent tenet with youth, that good company is every thing desirable, and that bad is even better than none.

I'm happy doing stand-up, but I'll probably do a television show eventually. If not, I'll delve into this Internet world and decide best how to harness it. What I like best about it is the independent movie style and the ability to just be completely reckless within that world. I like that a lot. I just have to acquaint myself with technology.

I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.

I never do impressions, but I probably should. People like that stuff.

There's no show business in Canada, so everybody just did stand-up and we all thought, "Oh, we'll just keep doing stand-up." And then I'm like, "There's more work in the States."