Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.

I tried to make the punchline as close to the setup as I could. And I thought that was the perfect thing. If I could make the setup and the punchline identical to each other, I would create a different kind of joke.

Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.

If you watch that show and you didn't know it was called Seinfeld, you'd think it was called 'The George Costanza Show'.

The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.

There's no show business in Canada, so everybody just did stand-up and we all thought, "Oh, we'll just keep doing stand-up." And then I'm like, "There's more work in the States."

I don't have any ambition.