We would seldom be deceived by flattery, did our own conceit not promote the delusion.

Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.

Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer.

There's that saying, "I don't know art, but I know what I like." The inverse is kind of true. I know art, but I don't know what I like. You get so immersed in it that nothing appeals to you.

Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.

There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.

Louis [C.K.] is great. But I don't know how many you could do.