Never raise expectations in others that you cannot realize: promise is less pleasing than disappointment is vexatious.

I'm a huge sports fan but have no interest in minutiae. I don't remember who won Super Bowls five years ago or listen to sports talk radio.

If you're watching a comedian on television and he's making a political point, I would say he's gotten too serious.

It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.

The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us.

I have a little bit of an out-of-body experience where I enjoy the scenario, and I really do like seeing a crowd turn into a mob, and I do nothing to stop it. People can become really dangerous.

I have always loved Las Vegas. It's a traditional place for lounge comics to perform, and I love that.