Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

All my life's about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn't cost very much money.

I have always loved Las Vegas. It's a traditional place for lounge comics to perform, and I love that.

Louis [C.K.] is great. But I don't know how many you could do.

The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.

I don't know anything about politics. Like, zero. Nothing.

When I started in Canada, I just did stand-up.