There has been a lot of progress during my lifetime, but I'm afraid it's heading in the wrong direction.

I myself am more and more inclined to agree with Omar and Satchel Paige as I grow older: Don't try to rewrite what the moving finger has writ, and don't ever look over your shoulder.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

Winter is the king of showmen, Turning tree stumps into snowmen And houses into birthday cakes And spreading sugar over lakes. Smooth and clean and frosty white, The world looks good enough to bite. That’s the season to be young, Catching snowflakes on your tongue. Snow is snowy when it’s snowing, I’m sorry it’s slushy when it’s going.

O money, money, money. I'm not necessarily one of those who think thee holy, but I often stop to wonder how thou canst go out so fast when thou comest in so slowly.

When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window.

Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny- Have you ever tried to buy them without money?