When you're wrong admit it, when you're right, shut up.

The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.

Then here's to the heartening wassail, Wherever good fellows are found; Be its master instead of its vassal, and order the glasses around.

When you're wrong admit it, when you're right, shut up.

There once was an umpire whose vision Was cause for abuse and derision He remarked in surprise, 'Why pick on my eyes? It's my heart that dictates my decision.'

They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball.

Then blessings on thee, my afternoon torpor Thou makest a prince of a mental porpor.