Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults as rotten SOB's given to fistfights, gunplay, and other mayhem. Kids who believe this about grownups aren't likely to argue about bedtime.

When I left the Lampoon, I went west to try that out, and discovered that I hated it.They were awful people turning out awful product .

What would annoy the most people most often? That is the true left-wing test of government intervention.

I'm here as a radio journalist but am not even sure which part of a tape recorder takes the pictures.

When I get in deep water, I prefer to announce that I'm in over my head.

Those who do not know history are probably also not doing well in English or math. P.J. O'Rourke

Whereas Rolling Stone, I just never had anything to do with them. I'd stop by the office maybe twice a year.