To mistrust science and deny the validity of the scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You'd better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.

Moscow has changed. I was here in 1982, during the Brezhnev twilight, and things are better now. For instance, they've got litter. In 1982 there was nothing to litter with.

Name me, if you can, a better feeling than the one you get when you've half a bottle of Chivas in the bag with a gram of coke up your nose and a teenage lovely pulling off her tube top in the next seat over while you're doing a hundred miles an hour in a suburban side street.

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.

These were people who believed everything about the Soviet Union was perfect, but they were bringing their own toilet paper.

[Al] Franken is left-wing and funny. He's a pretty good political humorist.

We like to pile language on language. Hunter [ S. Thompson] was an influence on me, no doubt about it.