In the Third World, honk your horn only under the following circumstances: 1. When anything blocks the road. 2. When anything doesn't. 3. When anything might. 4. At red lights. 5. At green lights. 6. At all other times.
P. J. O'RourkeThe motorcycle is a device created by the team of God and Darwin to rid the world of useless young males.
P. J. O'RourkeI've been a New Yorker for ten years, and the only people who are nice to us turn out to be Moonies.
P. J. O'RourkeI was never in the office [of Rolling Stone]. It was very different from Lampoon, where we spent a lot of time together socially, which is to say "drunk."
P. J. O'Rourke