When I became a man, I put away childish things and got more elaborate and expensive childish things from France and Japan.

Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.

Finally, one night we were smoking pot [with Michael O'Donoghue] and talking about the people that are invariably in high school, whether you go to prep school or public school or ghetto school or rich suburban school. And actually, it spun off from a Kurt Vonnegut quote.

I write because I like to make things and the only things I am good at making things with are words.

Crazy old people are our entire source of polling information.

Sometimes you need a B-2 bomber and sometimes you need your mother.

Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and he will be certain that you are either telling the truth or a big, important lie.