In my mind, I was always a comedian who was going to branch into writing.

If I were to just focus on stand-up, I could actually, paradoxically enough, be home way more, because I would leave on a Friday, go do a couple theaters Friday, Saturday, maybe Sunday, come home.

The Kentucky Fried Chicken corporation made a bobble head of me and sent it to my management. No card, nothing.

If you play comedic scenes like they're really serious, then it's so much more funny than if you're going for a laugh.

The idea of, 'The journey is the destination' is put into action by browsing in an indie record store. Besides, a human being is a much better guide than a 'More Like This' link on the internet.

Lot of ugly funny dudes end up with some pretty gorgeous women. Women are much deeper than us in choosing a mate - they see in the long term.

I'm not familiar with the metric system.