Only Atheists have morals, the religious have reward and punishment. That's not morality, that's sucking up.

The medium is not the message - the message is the message.

If I go out to dinner with you and you order wine, I leave. I won't be around drugs and alcohol at all.

I intend to do the Penn & Teller show until they pry my cheesy magic wand from my cold dead fingers.

If you believe that there’s a heaven and hell . . . how much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?

The definition of a stupid thing is something that if you do everything right, you still get hurt. Fire-eating and love are stupid things.

When I was 15, 16, 17 years old, I spent five hours a day juggling, and I probably spent six hours a day seriously listening to music. And if I were 16 now, I would put that time into playing video games.