I might be collecting wheely bins in 12 months time but at least they'll be wheely bins outside back gates that I know, in a part of the country that I love. There's no place like home!

One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.

If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?

No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?

The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity.

You never know where to look when eating a banana.