The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined.

Do you work in a strip club?

I never see any home cooking - all I get is fancy stuff.

There's a cord sticking out of the back. Might you tell me where it goes?

I have very little experience of self-government. In fact, I am one of the most governed people in the world.

Why don't you go and live in a hostel to save cash?

Change does not change tradition, it strengthens it. Change is a challenge and anopportunity, not a threat.