The key is to commit crimes so confusing that police feel too stupid to even write a crime report about them.

A birthday wish granted 23 years late is still a birthday wish granted.

It hurts to find out that what you wanted doesn't match what you dreamed it would be.

Think of life as a giant, fat cat you're in charge of. Sometimes you can control it, but other times, it's going to do what it wants and you have to roll with it. And sometimes you can do everything - everything you're s'posed to do- and it'll still shred all the things you hold dear... The only thing you can really do with life is rub its belly and prepare for the worst.

Ed Wood served a great purpose - mainly making writers feel better about their work.

Being prepared for loss is never the same as being ready for it.

Death likes it when you play hard to get.