King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner!

Dolly Parton, who said to her doctor, Are you sure it's a chest cold? Never got a dinner!

Lot, who said to his wife as she was being turned into a pillar of salt, Stop shaking! Never got a dinner!

Joe Torre, who switched to first base because he didn't want to go through life as Chicken Catcher Torre. Never got a dinner!

Joan Rivers, who said to Marcel Marceau, Can we talk? Never got a dinner!

Helen of Troy, a hooker from Upstate New York. Never got a dinner!

John Wilkes Booth, who said, Sorry, I thought he was a critic. Never got a dinner!