Dracula, who said while they drove a wooden stake into his heart, Boy, I sure hope this is heartburn. Never got a dinner!

Julius Caesar's wife, who said to Julius, We are not naming our son Sid! Never got a dinner!

Dean Martin's pancreas, who overheard his liver singing I got a right to sing the blues. Never got a dinner!

John Wilkes Booth, who said, Sorry, I thought he was a critic. Never got a dinner!

Donald Trump's mother, who said, Donnie! Stop playing Monopoly and get in that barber's chair! Never got a dinner!

Dracula, who said while they drove a wooden stake into his heart, Boy, I sure hope this is heartburn. Never got a dinner!

Alexander the Great, who said on his wedding night, It's only a nickname. Never got a dinner!