To me, the acceptable level of fecal matter is... zero.

To me, the acceptable level of fecal matter is... zero.

Ridiculous that some people feel superior to the gay minority. They're the only couples you'll ever find poking around for ceramics and candle holders in the winery gift shop and both parties really want to be there.

Michael Jackson is what happens when you keep fixin' it until it's broke!

Easiest job you could ever have... whoever gets to put Michael Jackson in a witness chair and create reasonable doubt.

Success is made up of courage, brains, and luck. Since the first two are a function of the third, it's pretty much all luck.

Sports are an acceptable way for men to show emotion. A guy who won't hug his kid will slip a guy a tongue in a sports bar when his team wins.