Sports are an acceptable way for men to show emotion. A guy who won't hug his kid will slip a guy a tongue in a sports bar when his team wins.

Michael Jackson is what happens when you keep fixin' it until it's broke!

I met a girl, we ate, we drank, had sex, got married, had affairs, broke up - God, what a night that was!

If you ever thought you were ugly, Los Angeles is the place to come and find out you were right.

Nobody is really qualified to be the president. Basically it's an acting job. You have to act like you're the president. And every four years the country holds a big casting call.

Seventy-five percent of all Americans believe that angels are real. Which is amazing when you consider that forty percent of all Americans think DNA evidence is unreliable.

There is no romance without some lying. That's what romance is - a little bit of Vaseline on the camera lens of life.