Why is human cloning illegal? All it is is making a certain type of person on purpose. Can they possibly be any worse than the assholes we're pumping out by accident?

In New York, the principal leisure activity is internal bleeding.

The way I see life, it's like we're all flying on the Hindenburg, why fight over the window seats?

Brooklyn is the only place where a guy can open up a candy store sell no candy and gross over eight million dollars a year.

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the other half end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones!

I met a girl, we ate, we drank, had sex, got married, had affairs, broke up - God, what a night that was!

You know what the average person is? Average.