I think sometimes you get given a good pile of goodwill, and it's whether you use it up in the first six months or spread it out over a career.

Mondays are fine. It's your life that sucks

I don't believe in about 2700 Gods. Christians don't believe in 2699 Gods. They're nearly as atheistic as me.

There's a difference between a job and a career - if you're the boss you don't stop at six o'clock, you have to worry about everything all the time.

Animals are not here for us to do as we please with. We are not their superiors, we are their equals. We are their family. Be kind to them.

I remember one review of The Office Christmas Special that compared it unfavourably to Dickens. What? You're saying I'm not as good as the greatest storyteller ever. Boo! Boo! I think I can live with that.

A world without any lies at all is not a good world, because it's artless and because there are no white lies, no flattery.