Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.

In Milwaukee last month a man died laughing over one of his own jokes. That's what makes it so tough for us outsiders. We have to fight home competition.

One of the easiest forms of pretense to break down is the pretense of enthusiasm for exotic foods. Just bring on the exotic foods.

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.

If there is a streak of ham anywhere in an actor, Shakespeare will bring it out.

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.

Next to an old-fashioned church social, or possibly a monster bridge party, there is no buzz which can equal the sibilant buzz ofa matinée.