The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him. That remark in itself wouldnโt make any sense if quoted as it stands. The average man ought to be allowed a quotation of no less than three sentences, one to make his statement and two to explain what he meant. Ralph Waldo Emerson was about the only one who could stand having his utterances broken up into sentence quotations, and every once in a while even he doesnโt sound so sensible in short snatches.
Robert BenchleyThe pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.
Robert BenchleyA real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
Robert BenchleyAll that a spectator gets out of the game is fresh air, the comical articles in his program, the sight of twenty-two young men rushing about in mysterious formations, and whatever he brought in his flask.
Robert Benchley