The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such a state that no family of characters is considered true to life whichdoes not include at least two hypochondriacs, one sadist, and one old man who spills food down the front of his vest.

Nothing makes a man feel older than to hear a band coming up the street and not to have the impulse to rush downstairs and out on to the sidewalk.

Birds which are the same color as the foliage in which they nest are less likely to be disturbed by other birds who want to drop in and chat, and therefore last longer.

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.

She sleeps alone at last.

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets him have one

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.