Change is not popular; we are creatures of habit as human beings. 'I want it to be the way it was.' But if you continue the way it was there will be no 'is.'

My childhood was really nice. My parents never forced me to do anything; it was always, "If you want to do that, fine." When I told my father I was going to be an actor, he said, "Fine, but study welding just in case."

I like my wine like my women - ready to pass out.

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.'

I learned that by being entertaining you make a connection with another person.

Honey, you [Michael Jackson] gotta pick a race first. All of a sudden you're a black man, then you're Diana Ross, now you're Audrey Hepburn. Then he's got the little beard going on. He's like Lord of the Rings, the entire cast. Michael's about to jump species.