Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it 'all the money,' but they changed it to 'alimony.' It's ripping your heart out through your wallet.

I know size can be daunting but don't be afraid.

Crying never helped anybody do anything, okay? You have a problem, you face it like a man.

I feel like I'm a big human snot.

I was an only child. I did have kind of like a lonely existence.

I went to rehab [for alcoholism] in wine country, just to keep my options open.

I can be trained, I can actually show you how intelligent I am, I can use a word like delicatessen and know what it means.