Carpe per diem - seize the check.

Some are born great. Some achieve greatness. Some get it as a graduation gift.

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party.

I can be trained, I can actually show you how intelligent I am, I can use a word like delicatessen and know what it means.

Even when I did my Broadway show, I did 15 minutes no one had seen before, because that was the night that Michael Jackson protested about Al Sharpton bailing on him. I said, "Wow, if that man bails on you, this must be really a lost cause."

I had one or two steady girlfriends in high school, but then in college, it was three, four... I went crazy. At one point I had three separate girlfriends, running around mad.

There's three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular basis, and a navy blazer.