Even evangelicals realize that Pinocchio's father was a carpenter too. That's the old joke.

Oh, no. To live... to live would be an awfully big adventure.

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes

You have an internal critic, an internal drive that says, 'OK, you can do more.' Maybe that's what keeps you going.

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.'

Now you can't even carry a nail clipper on a plane. Are they afraid you're going to go..."All right! Give me the plane or the b*tch loses her cuticle." ?

Crying never helped anybody do anything, okay? You have a problem, you face it like a man.