I met Jonah Lomu. I never knew how huge he was. I felt like a peasant in a Godzilla movie. 'Quickly! Tell the other villagers! We go now!'

Comedy can be a cathartic way to deal with personal trauma.

We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race.

As intellectual as we think we are, you still trip, we still have human foibles, sexuality, all the different things to still make you aware of your humanity.

If you're that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution, to a temporary problem.

I've always improvised, and stand-up was this great release. All of a sudden, it was just me and the audience.

Taking Viagra after open heart surgery is like a Civil War re-enactment with live ammo. Not good.