Having George W. Bush giving a lecture on business ethics is like having a leper give you a facial, it just doesn't work!

I have no desire to go anywhere near drugs. People say, "Aren't you tempted?" No, because of the ridiculousness of it.

If there was a pill that allowed you to drink and not get drunk, an alcoholic would go "What happens if you take two?"

Women! Can't live with 'em, can't live with 'em!

You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you'll win, no matter what the outcome.

After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was; I just have fewer dents in my car.

My children give me a great sense of wonder. Just to see them develop into these extraordinary human beings. And a favorite book as a child? Growing up, it was 'The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe' - I would read the whole C.S. Lewis series out loud to my kids. I was once reading to Zelda, and she said 'don't do any voices. Just read it as yourself.' So I did, I just read it straight, and she said 'that's better.'