I don't do well with snakes and I can't dance.

Come on now! You kick out the gooks, the next thing you know, you have to kick out the chinks, the spicks, the spooks, the kikes and all that's going to be left is a couple of brain-dead rednecks.

Being in the same room with people and creating something together is a good thing.

Jamie Kilstein is amazing and I will be spreading the word. He has the spark that energized my conscience. We need more comedians kicking it hard the way he does every night

When you create you get a little endorphin rush. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?

After my training wheels, my first real bike was a Schwinn, and my first time out, I rode down a hill, didn’t know how to stop, and ran right into a tree. So, that was a nice experience ... like realizing, oh, there are brakes!

What's my credibility? Why are they looking to me for advice? Isn't there someone more qualified?