You know what music is? God's little reminder that there's something else besides us in this universe; harmonic connection between all living beings, every where, even the stars.

Here's the best birth control in the whole world, if you really, if you have no pills, if you have no diaphragm, if you have no other form of contraception. Use it for ladies, if he comes at you with that little thing in his hand, just laugh at it. They can't deal with it, OK, it'll be gone.

The first time I tried organic wheat bread, I thought I was chewing on roofing material

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'

They say our mothers really know how to push our buttons - because they installed them

Ronald Reagan is the world's largest Muppet.

Sucking the marrow out of life doesn't mean choking on the bone.