You know what music is? God's little reminder that there's something else besides us in this universe; harmonic connection between all living beings, every where, even the stars.

If I asked you about love, you'd probably quote me a sonnet. But you've never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable. Known someone that could level you with her eyes, feeling like God put an angel on earth just for you. Who could rescue you from the depths of hell.

Texting and driving at the same time is like jerking off and juggling at the same time. Too many balls in the air, if you catch my drift.

It is hard to find something where you can go off as much as I do in stand-up, but I think stand-up allows me that freedom where you can really go off and have a good time.

I don't practice anything. I spend time looking over ideas and then just get out and do it.

I learned that by being entertaining you make a connection with another person.

And some people say Jesus wasn't Jewish. Of COURSE he was Jewish! 30 years old, single, lives with his parents, come on! He works in his father's business, his mom thought he was God's gift, he's Jewish! Give it up!