I was a huge fan of comedy when I was a child.

I'm a comedian, and I like to work on my live show, and if I'm doing television, I don't have time to work on my live show, and I can become a lame comic, and that sucks.

People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.

I smoke really good cigars, I don't smoke Cuban cigars. I would never do anything as Un-American as smoke a decent cigar.

There are a million really good cigars, you gotta really float around cigars. It's not like being locked into a brand of cigarettes; at least to me it's not.

You can't fix stupid.

I was a huge fan of comedy when I was a child.