I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.

I quit smoking cigarettes and with the $70 a month I am saving not smoking cigarettes I'm smoking $700 worth of cigars.

When life hands you lemons make lemonade. Then find someone who's life gave them Tequila and have a party.

We have hearing aids in order to fix our ears. We have lasik surgery in order to fix our eyes. People ... you can't fix stupid!

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

If you kill someone in Texas, we'll kill ya back.

I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.