I'm either mentally ill or Jewish. I can't sometimes tell the difference.

Laugh every day as much as you can.

I figure if the kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done my job.

Suddenly, people had three phone numbers but never answered their phones.

I am an observant Jew! Now my secret is out.

Women are cursed, and men are the proof.

It's the Night of the Living Dead. It's scary out here.