I’m not a politician. I think that uniquely qualifies me to become president of the U.S.

my parents ... had decided early on that all of the problems in my family had somehow to do with me. All roads led to Roseyville, a messy, chaotic town where, as parents, they were required to visit, but could never get out of quick enough or find a decent parking place.

Patriarchy is a bully notion, which if you will notice NEVER attacks a nation that can defend itself. Zionism is patriarchal and sets Judaism on its head.

My real life is funnier than anything on TV.

We're not meant to be parents when we're 50.

I think I should be here alone to rethink the world, I do. I want these lesser humans gone.

Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles.