School is very demanding these days.

When people are rushed, they're stressed and you greatly increase the likelihood of being punitive and unilateral just because you're trying to grasp control.

If a solution isn't mutually satisfactory, it's not going to stick.

You're your kid's partner, not the person who's pulling all the strings.

When there's a good fit between skills and expectations, there's what we call compatibility, and we would expect a good outcome. When there's a poor fit between expectations and the capacity of the kid, there is incompatibility, and that's when we see people exhibit challenging behavior.

It's a whole lot more productive to be in problem-solving mode than it is to be in behavior modification mode.

Kids are overprogrammed these days.