Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf.

Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms.

We are all born into the world with nothing. Everything we acquire after that is profit.

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.

"Tell me, doctor, " said the patient, "when I stand on my head, the blood rushes to it. Why doesn't it rush to my feet now?" "That's because your feet aren't empty," said the doctor.

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.

Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.