Nobody's too fat - they're just too short.
Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork.
If we are what we eat, why aren't we new, improved, fat-free, and light.
Highways are full of careless drivers who are always too close in front of you.
"Tell me, doctor, " said the patient, "when I stand on my head, the blood rushes to it. Why doesn't it rush to my feet now?" "That's because your feet aren't empty," said the doctor.
Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn't be done.