Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms.

Crime in the cities is very discouraging. Apartment house dwellers have locks, bolts, chains and bars on their doors. It takes a tenant longer to get out than a burglar to get in.

Success has a simple formula: do your best, and people may like it.

Highways are full of careless drivers who are always too close in front of you.

On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, "Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device". The question is, why doesn't the plane just become a boat?

I try to figure my adjusted gross income, but no matter how I figure it, it's still gross.

A neighbor will stand at your door talking for 20 minutes because she doesn't have time to come in.