Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms.

A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.

Two things help to keep one's job. First, let the boss think he's having his own way. Second, let him have it.

The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect.

On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, "Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device". The question is, why doesn't the plane just become a boat?

A man can please his wife with a box of candy, surprise her with a bouquet of flowers, and make her suspicious with a gold bracelet.

As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown up, a credit card does it.