If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows.
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
You know what the problem is with world hunger? We've been sending them food.
Well, life was tough, but at least I was able to live it out and I was able to face death and not be afraid.
It occurred to me that there wouldn't be world hunger, if you people would MOVE WHERE THE FOOD IS!!!
Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'