I look for women I know are gonna bust me up good. Come on, man, who can resist that? Who can resist that emotional pain? Yeah, they all have the same line, they're so sweet: I'm not gonna hurt you like all the others. Really I'm not. I'm gonna introduce you to a whole new level of pain!

AIDS is a horrible disease, and the people who catch it deserve compassion.

I'm responsible. I even did a commercial for MTV saying how I was going to register to vote. And I still haven't.

When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man.

I got divorced, which was not a good thing for a revivalist minister. It did not go down well. I'd already been banned from a couple churches for my jokes. So one day I woke up and decided it was time to start living for myself.

I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.

With any other celebrity, people come up and say, 'Hey, I really like your work.' But with my fans, when they see me, they don't even say hello. They just go, 'AWWWWWGHGHHHGHGHRRR!'