It is better for your career to do nothing, than to do something and attract criticism.

The human mind is a delusion generator, not a window to trurh.

Never base your budget requests on realistic assumptions, as this could lead to a decrease in your funding.

I was surprised to learn that doing household chores qualifies as romantic for most of you [women]. That's exactly why you should never hire a butler if you strike it rich - the minute that Jeeves starts unloading the dishwasher without being asked, your wife is going to start humping his leg.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.

For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.