When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater.
Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don't.
Always remember that as long as other people are gullible, there's no limit to what you can achieve.
Sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
There's a gigantic gray area between good moral behavior and outright felonious activities. I call that the Weasel Zone and it's where most of life happens.