The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one.
The best thing about humour is that it shows people they are not alone.
If I don't believe it, I don't care.
In between goals is a thing called life, that has to be lived and enjoyed.
Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end.
The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.